Sometimes when you’re angry you just want to let it out. Vent, vent, vent!
But that is wrong, wrong, wrong!
You might think that venting your anger is healthy, that the people around you are too sensitive, that your anger is justified, or that you need to show your fury to get respect. But the truth is that anger is much more likely to damage your relationships, impair your judgment, get in the way of success and have a negative impact on the way people see you. That’s where anger management comes in.
Many people think that anger management is about learning to suppress your anger. But never getting angry is not a good goal. Anger is normal, and it will come out regardless of how hard you try to tamp it down. The true goal of anger management isn’t to suppress feelings of anger but rather to understand the message behind the emotion and express it in a healthy way without losing control. When you do, you’ll not only feel better, you’ll also be more likely to get your needs met, be better able to manage conflict in your life, and strengthen your relationships.
Mastering the art of anger management takes work, but the more you practice, the easier it will get. And the payoff is huge. Learning to control your anger and express it appropriately will help you build better relationships, achieve your goals and lead a healthier, more satisfying life.
When should I get more help?
Anger becomes a problem if it is:
- Too frequent
- Too intense
- Lasts too long
- Leads to aggression
- Interfering with family life, job performance or school performance
- Leading you to lose control of your actions or what you say
- Preventing you and your loved ones from enjoying life
- Leading you to act in a threatening or violent manner towards yourself or others
- A Strategy for controlling your anger. American Psychological Association. Retrieved October 4, 2018 from: http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/controlling-anger.aspx.
- Controlling anger before it controls you. Retrieved October 4, 2018 from: American Psychological Association. http://www.apa.org/topics/anger/control.aspx.
- Mehta M, et al., eds. (2015). Anger management. In: A Practical Approach to Cognitive Behaviour Therapy for Adolescents. New Delhi, India: Springer India.
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